Sometimes the boss stresses you out and other times it’s a co-worker who’s a bully, but no matter what it is you must face it in order to relieve the anxiety that a difficult situation creates. Dumb Little Man wrote an excellent article, How to Deal with a Workplace Bully. I’ve had mild cases of being bullied. Some people just like to push themselves on to you. They might not even realize that they are making you feel uncomfortable. Try talking to them and making them aware of how they are acting and most likely they will stop. If they don’t, then try reading this article and see if you can use some of his tips.
Bullying is a deliberate attempt to control or undermine you. It typically happens over a prolonged period of time and it can severely damage your self esteem and confidence. It can be subtle or overt. It can take place in private or in front of others. The circumstances can vary greatly from person to person. Here are some examples of bullying behavior at work:
A co-worker or supervisor constantly complains to other team members that you aren’t pulling your weight. They make jokes at your expense and accuse you of making mistakes you haven’t made. In private they constantly belittle, insult and even threaten you. You feel frightened, angry, ashamed and embarrassed.
Most of our stress doesn’t come from the work itself; it’s the people who we are involved with that cause our stress. Please be aware of how other people are making you feel, and if they aren’t treating you right then stand up for yourself or find help.
“Most of our stress doesn’t come from the work itself” So so true! I can relate to that!
Thanks Shamelle! It’s surprising how much stress is caused by external things such as bullies, but we should also be aware of internal influences such as hormones and body aches. The more aware we are of our stress the better we can deal with it.
When I’m working in my office on my computer, trying to concentrate, and people in the hallway are chatting loudly, or the guy in the office next to me is on the phone (he’s very loud), or any other noise distracts me and I can’t concentrate, I get stressed. Initially I felt guilty closing the door but I am starting to care less what other people think about my closed door.
When I have a pile of projects that are all on deadline, and my boss adds to it, I get stressed. I try to just take things one thing at a time. I also try to touch every project every day so I know the status of everything.
Hey Butterscotch, when we work so closely with others it can be difficult dealing with strong personalities. You seem to be doing a good job of doing what’s best for you. The less that we care about what our co-workers think the better choices we can make based on the situation, not people’s feelings.