What do you think would happen if everyone in your office vowed to stop spreading negativity?
Would it improve the communication in your office or maybe reduce the daily stress that you feel?
The majority of your time is spent at work. Regardless of whether you love your job, or whether it's only a necessity for keeping a roof over your kids' heads, you can make it a happier and better place to be all those hours.
I used to work in a toxic office environment. Our boss was not a warm and kind sort of person. She set the tone for a hostile and negative work environment. Soon everyone was grumpy and unhappy at work. I hated to get up in the morning because I hated my job.
My coworkers were fearful of losing their incomes, yet hated coming to work. We all complained incessantly to each other, and we stopped caring about the quality of our work. I wasn’t aware of how or why it happened, only that I hated it.
Then one day a new hire came to me for paperwork. She was enthusiastic and cheerful and sweet. I really liked her. A couple weeks later she came to talk to me again. She closed my office door and started crying.
She came to see me because she thought I was the only nice person there, and she told me she wanted to quit because the place was so depressing and unfriendly.
Listening to her felt like a light bulb switching on. I realized that I was just as guilty in spreading negativity as the others every time I participated in talk about how awful the boss was or how grumpy or mean another coworker was.
Gossip and negativity should have no place at work. They should have no place even in our hearts. If we want happier and better lives at work or at home, we have to take charge of negativity.
1. Find an Ally
I talked to my friend and coworker Sarah across the hall. I told her about the new hire’s situation. Sarah was also depressed by the gossip and negativity that surrounded us at work. I confided to her that I had promised myself time and again I would not engage in gossip about anyone, only to be horrified at myself for joining in every time. Sarah felt that the negative attitudes and complainers drew her in and made her as miserable as they were.
Sarah and I made a pact. We decided to become positive forces at work. We would NOT give in to gossip or negativity. We made the process fun by making up code words to alert each other if we noticed either of us was “falling off the wagon.” That encouragement and support from each other helped both of us to succeed where we used to fail.
2. Start a Movement
Sarah and I found that when we did not participate in negativity ourselves, our other coworkers were more fun and uplifting to be around because we had to find other topics to discuss than what a jerk our boss was.
Another of Sarah’s pet peeves was the lack of teamwork from certain individuals. She began to set the example herself of offering to help other people with their work.
One evening when I was leaving, I noticed a coworker still hard at it. I really wanted to get home, but I asked her what I could do to help so she could go home sooner too. She was very grateful, and I realized it benefited me too. It gave me an amazing feeling! Negativity produces hostility and anger, but kindness produces good will and spreads positivity.
The nicer everything got at work, the more of my own faults I began to see. Another necessary step to improving office morale was a friendlier stance with a couple of people I didn’t like.
I didn’t feel that I had to socialize with people I didn’t care for, but I found that just behaving generally more pleasant toward them actually made me feel better myself.
Try making eye contact and smiling at every person you come in contact with, whether they are coworkers, vendors or customers, even when you don’t like them. You’ll see what I mean about feeling better.
3. Work for Someone Else
If you don’t like your boss, then tell yourself you are not working for him! Tell yourself you work hard and do a good job for God. Or for the Universe or whatever you believe in and value. Do it for yourself. Do it for the experience or a building block for something greater in the future.
Remember when you interviewed for your job? Remember how badly you hoped to get hired? Remember to be grateful! Lots of other people are out of work or making less money than you. They would love to have your job. You are lucky to have it! Remember to count your blessings. *Editor's note: Mindset is the most important part of building a happy and great career.
Being kind to everyone at work makes your own days more pleasant, but there are also other advantages. You may be able to get recommendations from coworkers or make unexpected connections through them that can lead to better opportunities.
You don’t have to socialize or engage with them any further than that if you don’t want to. Just smile at them as you walk by. Make an effort to be pleasant if not friendly. You will FEEL more pleasant and friendly just by smiling. It can also make you a happier person!
There is a very real relationship between cultivating a positive attitude and achieving a happier and better life. Do you want to have a more uplifting, positive workplace? Start the movement yourself. Be the office hero, and take charge of negativity.
- Spread a positive attitude.
- Care about other people!
- Help your coworkers.
- Be kind.
Just imagine if everyone just followed the last rule how much more positive our work experience would be.
Have you or someone you know spread an attitude of positivity in your workplace? Please share your story or just make a comment.
* Contributed by Deborah Shelby who writes inspiration for a happier and better life at Prayerful Mom.
** Image courtesy of @boetter
7 thoughts on “How to Stop Office Negativity”
Absolutely agree with 'I didn’t feel that I had to socialize with people I didn’t care for' point...I think that way till date...until I saw your post... it pays really just to behave normally with people you do not bother much
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Hi, James. Deborah here. Thanks for commenting! Yes, I think if we all "behave normally with people," as you say, it makes our own days more pleasant. Sometimes we don't realize that we cause ourselves added stress by our own behavior toward others. We don't have to like everyone, but if we treat them with respect, life (and work) is easier for all of us.
Great topic...I have been able to turn my attitude about my job completely around recently by focusing on NOT complaining about various aspects of the work that I dislike or think are unnecessary, the mistakes and shortcomings of others, etc. It is almost as if by not speaking these things aloud, they no longer occupy as large a space in my mind as they used to. That does not mean that a little "venting" from time to time is not a good thing, and it can help to briefly compare notes with others to see if they are having some of the same problems. Also, I have decided to speak to my boss only about specific issues that he can help me change, or get changed for me. The boss has to absorb so much griping and pettiness from so many people...I am learning to be an island of support for him instead of one more draining sucking source of gloom and frustration. Nowhere near perfect yet, but this turnaround in my attitude has been a big help to me in accepting the circumstances I face in my life at work.
Fabulous, Martha! I wish I worked with you! I'm sure your boss really appreciates your support and positivity.
there's no doubt that office gossip undermines productivity and creates tension. avoiding this practice is a good way to create a positive working environment and harmony in the office.
Office Politics and pulling coworkers leg can create tension in office environment. Frustrated employees in return spread negativity and bad words about the company. Mangers can also arrange open discussions and meetings to listen to their employees issues and try to find out the main reason behind this negativity
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