Do you wish you had a larger network of friends to find more business or a new job?
People often want easy relationships. They want easy and all they get are acquaintances.
We want instant respect from other people without putting in the effort to earn it. You’ve probably seen this on the car lot or in a department store. The sales person comes on bull force expecting you to accept every point that they make.
They don’t even ask one single question.
“How can I help you?”
Simple, but isn’t done often enough
The reason Liz Strauss, Guy Kawasaki, and Darren Rowse are so popular. They help and help and help until people can’t resist, but sing their praises.
Building Friendships
Good relationships with customers take time to build. Building a relationship with a co-worker takes 10 times longer.
It’s important to know what a person likes and doesn’t like if you expect to create a connection worthy of calling it a relationship. The only way to do this is to ask the person questions.
Next time you are trying to build a relationship with a co-worker or customer, ask them what their goals are, ask them about their family, and ask them about their hobbies. Let the other person talk.
Know Their Likes and Dislikes
Allow that person to share their likes and dislikes.
You’ll gather more information to build a friendship in one hour than most people ever try to get out of another person in a month.
This information will help you build friendships that will last. When you know what makes other people happy, they will want to be around you and help you succeed. Once you know their needs, joys, and hot spots (not that kind of hot spot!) you can help them.
And helping them encourages them to want to help you.
Business is that easy. Really. Just no one wants to put in the effort.
Here are 5 Business Building Rules I live by:
1. Know what people need by asking questions.
2. Develop your superpowers every day because people will need your skills.
3. Help them understand their needs.
4. Help them when they are in pain.
5. Don’t expect anything in return.
I know the last one is hard. We are inherently selfish, but if you can help without expecting anything back these people will sing your praises. They will refer you to all their friends and family.
How about you?
What do you do to build your friendships?
How do you help people become more successful?
* It’s Spread-the-Love Day, when I encourage you to spread the word about Work Happy Now. You might:
> Link to a post on Twitter (follow me @workhappynow)
> Sign up for my FREE 10 Week E-Course and join over 800 people who have already improved their happiness at work. You will also receive a bi-monthly newsletter that gives you great tips and ideas on how to improve your career.
> Put a link to the blog in your Facebook status update
Thanks! I really appreciate any help. Word of mouth is the BEST.
* We all need to wrap our arms around our fears and give them a big hug. A hug that shows we appreciate them, but won't be bully by them. Joy over at Evolving Beings has a wonderful guest post about embracing fear.
If you enjoyed this post then you will probably like these too:
> Take Back Control of Your Business – Series
> Are Friendships the Key to Workplace Happiness?
Image courtesy of celebdu
Hi Karl,
I happened to stop by and then I see the link..what a surprise--thank you:)
Anything I create in life is created out of love and through connections..I know myself well, and I want to know others just as well..
I am outgoing and greatly enjoy talking to everyone; I am inspired by people and their stories. I listen because I am interested and I get to know people rather quickly..
As I build my business, others are frustrated with me because I am building slowly...Through my blog, I want to know and connect with each reader, I make heart connections and I truly care. And I receive back as much from those connections as what I share..it's truly an amazing flow.
I readily share my blog space with those who have touched my life or inspired me. I search out "newbies" and invite them to share in my space. I write notes of appreciation to those whose work impacts me, and I write notes of encouragement to those who seem to 'need' it..
As far as business loyalty as a consumer, I tend to invest my resources in the places that show me respect as a customer, that truly listen to my needs and show me what is available to meet those specific needs...
Hey Karl,
To me, everyone has the capacity to be extraordinary and have a life that they love. Each person has skills and talents which can be used to help make the world a better place. So I help people see what is already inside of them.
Each person is beautiful and capable of so much. They just need to see what they have and work with it. So many times people think they have to morph themselves to fit a standard. There is no need to do that.
And I love what you wrote about not expecting anything in return. That is so true. Giving should be done with love and if you get something back, great but if not...that is great too.
Hope all is awesome!
> They help and help and help until people can’t resist, but sing their praises.
Very well put.
They're connected and they have empathy.
nice article about business building rules! awesome post! thanks for sharing.
Hi Joy, Good for you. Others may get frustrated with your heart centered approach, but that's because they don't see the value in it. As long as it allows you to be happy, productive, and build friendships that's all that matters.
Hi Nadia, We have to believe we have extraordinary gifts otherwise we will never do amazing work to change the world. We need to give these gifts to others, many times for free to get to a point were we can help the most people.
Hi J.D., Thanks. It's so important to have empathy when we are trying to connect with clients/customers, otherwise we are creating blindly without taking into account what people really need.
Hi J.B., Thanks!
Hi Karl -- it's funny how, in our culture, I don't think we tend to make the connection between building a business and growing as a person, but learning to let our natural curiosity out, which is important for building the business, can also help us to find the fulfillment we're looking for in life overall.
Wonderful thoughts!
In business, there's nothing wrong doing good as long it does not hurt. Take it as a habit if you can.
Powerful marketing like " word of mouth " usually comes out of this like a good karma.
Hi Karl,
A thoughtful and well written article, as usual. I think there is increasing evidence to suggest that we're actually more wired for compassion and cooperation than selfishness (check out Jeremy Rifkin's work on this), although that doesn't mean we're not motivated (or encouraged or trained) to act from purely selfish desires at times.
You are so right that many people just want "instant friendships", "instant business relationships" or instant relationships, period. It's not really a surprise considering we seem to live in a world that's been taken over by a mentality that's a weird combination of seeing people and resources as "disposable" and an expectation that we can have whatever we want instantly. (I think we're only just beginning to realize the high costs of this mind set to our societies and our planet.)
Your rules for business building are also valid rules for developing all relationships. As with any other kind of relationship, the key is to approach them from a heart-centred, sincere interest in the other person.
Have a great day!
Hi Chris, I agree. I think we can't have business growth without personal growth. Both are tied together. Once we open to this the learning becomes much quicker and more enjoyable.
Christian ethics-how to succeed in life-rules written by the Creator-published by the Son, supported by the Holy Spirit.
This may seem corny to many, but it is how to have a life that is fulfilling.
Thank you Karl. I very much enjoyed that post.
I really liked "Develop your superpowers every day because people will need your skills." I never thought of it that way when I'm increasing my skill levels. I agree, I've helped many others with just a tip here and there (and more), just because of the things I had learned along my own "entrepreneurial" journey.
If I could recommend a really great read for necessary business building traits, it would be this one http://eightpillarsofprosperity.com offered by my friend Christopher. It's a little bit heavy going, however worth staying with it.
For anyone visiting here, I have a few free opportunities that you might like to use for help with building your own online business presence...
http://www.personalimprovementguestpost.com
http://www.myforwardsteps.com/Story-Contribution.html
http://www.selfimprovementplus.com/linkyourvideo.html
All are free and I don’t expect anything in return. 🙂
Wishing you much success in your own ventures.
Cheers, Thea